Day 31 – Staring down Goals

“The past cannot be changed. The future is yet in your power.”


My squad car while I was a police officer (2005 – 2011)

Often as a police officer, there were times where I would be interacting with someone that might be much larger than me, they might know something I don’t know, they may have had a weapon or even worse they were yielding a weapon. During these times every action taken, by either side, makes a very large difference. As you have seen I am not a large person so many times I would use my words and stature to control many situations. Words were great, I could talk to so many people evil or not into or out of situations. I loved the ‘game’ of it all.

However, sometimes the words as I said would need to be accompanied by a stature and eye contact. I remember specifically one time I was responding to an incident where 4 or 5 adult males were fighting in a front yard. It was about 2 or 3 am, the only other officer on in the area was a good 30-minute drive doing the speed limit. I started screaming towards the location, hearing my good friend, the other offer tell me he was coming as fast as he could.  He was and still is one of the best police officers I have had the chance to work with and knew he was doing all he could to back me up.

As I took a left down the country road I could see the porch light, multiple cars parked in the driveway and figures swinging at each other and some rolling on the ground. It was about ‘Go’ time. My car came to screeching halt and my 150lb self-jumped out and ran my way towards the mob of 4 adults beating the shit out of each other. To make matters worse, there were people yelling from the porch play by play and egging them on, everyone that is beside the elderly home owner, later identified as one of the adult’s parent.

As I got near the group I started to command the men to stop what they were doing immediately. I was able to get them to look at me through the yelling and as soon as that happened I commanded them to sit down and sit on their hands. There’s an interesting phenomenon when you talk to grown adults like they are children sometimes they act like children and comply. It has got to be something about how they know inside they are being childish and comply unknowingly that they have resulted back 30 or 40 years in their reactions.


Anyways, they all listened and I started to assess what was going on as I hear a Crown Victoria fly up and the 6 foot plus buddy of mine hopped out and immediately assisted in the scene. As I briefed him on the situation with all of the children like adults sitting on the front lawn stared at us one jumped up. He started waving his hands asking the “why” “what” and “who” like any 2nd grader would, except he was 30. Without missing a beat my friend turned to this man and start making very long strides toward him staring him directly in his eyes. The man continued to talk but his voice became softer and softer as my friend worked his way closer to him.

This is where it starts to get pretty amazing. Commanding him to sit down as he lunged towards him with each step, my buddy was locked in on the eyes of this other man. The man walking backward started sitting as he was walking backward and seamlessly merged his butt to the ground. Upon landing, he closed his mouth and never said another word. We were then able to figure out the scene and process it as we normally would and moved on.

What I had witnessed and practiced was that with eye contact, a stern and commanding voice you are able to take control of a situation, resulting in no injuries. This isn’t always the case and sometimes other actions were necessary but what I am getting at is I have decided to go at my goals like my buddy and myself went in that situation. I have stared it down and now have commanded my thoughts of drinking to subside and sit on the ground as I assess what was going on and moved on. I’m done and this 1-month chip to me is pretty amazing.

After sharing with another friend of mine and talking about how I have journaled every day and run about every other day, it’s pretty amazing how all this has happened. I can now run 3 miles without feeling like death and even ran 5 miles a few days ago! So here’s to staring down those negative thoughts, habits, and personalities and commanding them into healthy habits and goals.

Run 18: 3.01 miles Avg Pace: 10’55”
Duration: 32:53
Mile 1: 10’42” Mile 2: 10’58”
Mile 3: 11’05”

35.71 Miles Since July 16th, 2017


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